And what is left behind?
It is for certain that at one point or another most of us have said or said something very similar to this to others…
‘Let it go… and get on with your life”
I say it all the time when I am working with people with so many different tonalities and my varied facial expressions. I also have very little doubt that we have all said it to ourselves on many occasions too.
Of course, with any change you go through in life, it has its advantages and disadvantages. The clarity and the focus of your mind-set will dictate the impact on the level of success you achieve. There are several ‘certainties’ that need to happen to ensure you get to where it is you want to be. The highest priority within these certainties sits within how you approach your need for change. For certain… you have to think differently, you have to speak differently, and you need to change the way you do things if you want the required changes to be positive and sustainable.
For most people changing how they think, how they talk about things or how they do things is initially uncomfortable. Even just having thoughts that explore being different to how they live their life now can be quite distressing and emotional never mind doing something about it. Without support and a lot of frustration later… a lot of people get to the point that they stop having the conversations about their dreams, desires, and their requirements for happiness with anyone…. except for the occasional internal chat with themselves and for the majority of the time, they keep getting the same answers… ‘it could be worse’ ‘it’s not that bad’ ‘give it a little time and it will sort itself out’ and back to the norm, you go.
The Beyond the Mask process explores the concept of ‘Letting Go of Letting Go’ as a stage of change which is filled with relief, intrigue and excitement. This is a stage that people going through Beyond the Mask explore very early doors. When exploring some of the things that people are looking to change it appears that there are certain circumstances that can be changed quite quickly and most importantly…permanently. By just creating an honest, positive and energised description of who you are… certain things can easily change with little effort.
I am not saying that this is as simple as that for everything you may want to change in your life but when you start to explore some of the reasons you do some of the things you do… quite often it is just a thought and quite often, that thought is not the truth, it has become invalid or very simply redundant. Bearing in mind that your Thoughts and your Emotions dictate your Actions… it is quite clear that reacting to old worn out and out of date thoughts will only take you further away from the change you want to experience in your life.
How to be the best you can be and be happy….
For anyone searching for the way to be the best, they can be, to achieve it and then sustain it… must manage the way they live their lives. When you take yourself seriously, you very quickly see when you make informed decisions that are made from a clear and concise mid-set, the actions you take speaks volumes about who you are… and what is your responsibility???… you just present your authenticity and be the best version of you that you can be… every day. It really is as simple as that.
I can absolutely guarantee you that ‘things’ will still sabotage your best-laid plans and ‘things’ will still find their way to the forefront of your mind with the outcome to distract you away from what you are focused on but… when you take yourself seriously, have a clear and tangible process to ensure the decisions you make are the right decisions to take you towards your very clear and concise lifestyle. The ‘thing’s that we all get given throughout our lives to distract you are dealt with effectively and efficiently… leaving you focused on the way forward. We all have a choice… react or respond… me… I respond…
I speak with people all the time that is going some form of change and all too often I hear those mortal words ‘ I should have tried this years ago’ and when I ask why they didn’t, a common response is a very simple ‘ I didn’t think I could… they describe long periods of time still holding on to old Thoughts and Emotions that kept them in the ‘Letting Go’ stage… I hear people describe themselves spending literally years and years of time ‘Letting Go’ of something that someone said to them or something that happened to them and had not managed to get to the ‘Letting Go of Letting Go’ stage… the stage when you know it’s done and not thought about in any negative ways… They just didn’t think they could do it.
The way you describe yourself is so dominant in the way your days roll out. ‘Letting go of Letting go’ leaves time to project forward with Thoughts and Emotions that are more associated with the lifestyle you are beginning to create.
I want to show you how easy it is to stop doing something you don’t want to be doing and to start to do something you want to be doing… the moment you realise you can change the way you think and feel and change how you do something… and fast… life begins to get a little more exciting, to say the least.
Take a few minutes to sit and just allow yourself to think about some of the small things you have been ‘Letting Go’ off for some time or wanting to ‘Let go’ off but still not managed to successfully let go off completely…
I am looking at the smaller things in life like having sugar in your tea or coffee, not eating breakfast and jumping straight into your day, being lazy and beginning to be more active with your spare time and taking time-out just for you are just some of the small things that so many people have been letting go off for a long time. These types of things that you are wanting to change may have been a part of you for some time no doubt. Don’t let yourself or anyone else trick you into thinking ‘you can’t change’ with adages like ‘you can’t change the spots of a leopard’… this is the counterbalanced thought-process that suggests ‘you can’t change who you are and how you do things, so why bother’… This is not the truth… and with only a little bit of thought, I think you know it too.
Trust me and just give it a go and see how easy it is…It is quite a surprise to most people when they first do this type of self-analysis to find a rush of things they would change in an instant if they could and have the counter-balanced recitational thought of ‘if only I could’… In so many cases, this is then followed with intrigues and flurry of thoughts rushing around their head exploring the answers to ‘what if I could’ ???
Having thought about some of the things you have wanted to change… and I am assuming along with the rest of us you will have a few… Just choose one for this moment, you can come back the rest at another time. Don’t choose the easiest and don’t choose the hardest. Choice one that will be a little bit of a challenge but nothing that is going to be hectic. Make sure the change you choose will really benefit you… and write it down. Don’t forget this is just to show you how easy it is to manage your actions… I’m sure you will then be able to see how to translate that into other areas of possible change you want to explore.
I’m going to change ‘I don’t eat breakfast’ to ‘I eat breakfast’ as an example of change.
I understand the reason I eat breakfast… I know my body needs to be healthy as my mind and after I have slept. I know my body works better when it has the appropriate levels of energy. If I am serious about being ME at my best… I eat breakfast… and absolutely benefit from it.
How do I describe myself… (Affirmation)
‘I enjoy breakfast every day and I see the benefits of having both a sharp mind and body’
Create your own affirmation about your ‘change’
Write it down on a sticky note pad and put them where you can see them. Put one so you can see it when you first wake up and places like on the fridge door. Keep saying it as many times in your head as you can. See yourself as a person who understood you and what needed to change to be the best they could be… and changed them.
The final stage in this is very straight forward… when you LET GO of something that isn’t good for you and replace it with something that is good for you… you begin to think differently… speak differently and you do things differently. Your thoughts are focused what is in front of you… the words you use describe what you are creating… what you do is exactly what you set out to do… you eat breakfast and have all the benefits from it.
Don’t underestimate the positiveness of making the statement… irrespective if you are giving up some of the small things in life or embarking on some of the big things in life… own it and share it.
Let it go and get on with your life… it’s waiting for you and you deserve it.